Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
