Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
