I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
