You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Randomize
