You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Green mimosas i think yes
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
