bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
