Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize