So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
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