he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
its not stalking. its research.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
