it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
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