remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
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