And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
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