Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize
