whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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