Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Randomize
