In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
