my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
