Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Just puked most of my soul out..
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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