I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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