I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
