I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
