can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Do you remember whose house we're in?
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
