At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
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