its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
