would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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