I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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