He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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