it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I'm like, not good at living.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
