I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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