we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
is it fun? or sober?
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