She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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