I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
