i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
