I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
