i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
