she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
