i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
