how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
