I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
