just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize
