"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
