But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
More tranny stories later!
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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