Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
