i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Randomize
