You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
