Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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