Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
