She said her name was "party"
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
so much tequila, so little girl.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
