i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Let the clothes fall where they may.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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