We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
