he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Don't EVER smell your tampon
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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